Saturday morning was lazy and misty. Andrew and I were curled up on the couch with our coffee, trying to talk ourselves into being productive. Willa and Ellen came rushing into the house yelling and since the baby was asleep, we shushed them. Until they repeated their news at an appropriate volume: “Lucy and Rocket are in the front yard!!!”

We jumped to our feet and ran outside. Sure enough, these two yahoos greeted me in the driveway:

Our property adjoins a pasture that is home to two horses and a donkey named Lucy. Our young neighbor rides barrel races (which I don’t understand but I can say it like I know, can’t I?) and we often see her riding one of the horses while talking on her cell phone.

Ah, modern farm life.

Anyway, our equine neighbors had broken the fence down and were calmly grazing in our front yard. I threw on some boots with my pajamas and worked on keeping them contained in our yard while Andrew went to find the owners.

I didn’t want them to leave our driveway because even though we are way back in the woods, just a few gallops off our property was a busy road. So I picked up a big stick and played Red Rover with a horse and a donkey. Fortunately, they lost interest in getting past me and turned back to the nice long grass in our front yard.

Naturally, I took pictures.

There was something pastoral about having a horse elegantly grazing in the front yard of our woodsy home.

It lost a bit of it’s quaintness when the donkey entered the picture.

Andrew reported that Lucy and Rocket’s owners weren’t home so he went in search of another neighbor who might have their cell phone number. It was about this time we discovered the other horse, Samson, holding court in our back yard.

I decided I’d better get busy rounding up the wildlife, so I cornered Rocket and attempted to put a rope around her neck.

*Cue Banjo Music*

When Andrew returned, without the much needed phone number, we walked my catch (ta-da!) down to the opening in the fence and shoved her back onto her side. Since Lucy was a donkey and acted very much like a donkey should, we opted to pull Samson out of the back yard before we tackled Lucy.

Funny thing: When Rocket noticed she was back home without her horsey boyfriend, she Lost. Her. Mind. She galloped up and down the pasture, whinnying and shaking her mane. She was a crazed lady. Samson returned her calls and trotted toward us but he got distracted by the yummy grass and slowed his progress.

His woman was Seriously Displeased.

Andrew roped Samson’s neck and put a little hitch in his giddyup. The two lovers were reunited at last. They nuzzled noses, then necks, and then gave each other a sweet horsey hug.

Meanwhile, Lucy took advantage of all this romance and inched away from the hole in the fence. Andrew had to track her down and then get a rope around her neck. Without getting kicked. Or scaring her off. He managed it by fashioning a lasso of sorts and throwing it on her head, then rushing to wrangle her into the rope before she skittered away.

Gah, I love that man.

I stood nearby with my stick, ready to… poke any wayward beasts. I’m not sure how effective my plan was, but I had my best serious eyes in place to go along with my stick. And with my fresh-out-of-bed look, I like to think I was pretty fearsome to behold.

Andrew patched the fence tightly and we went inside to “celebrate” an entire morning lost to our mini-Rodeo.

Which is why it was much less exciting when we discovered the three Lawn Mowers back in our yard after lunch. Fortunately, the owner had returned home by then and we were able to help him get the wayward animals back in the yard and the right hole in the fence patched.

Of course, the afternoon was lost to chasing Lucy through the forest and then rinsing off the poison ivy we crashed through. So I guess it’s safe to say that we actually did spend the entire day at the rodeo… and never even had to leave home!